December 10th, 2013

Rant

Things I do not do

There are things I do not do. I do not lie. I do not mislead. I do not threaten. I do not gaslight. I do not block people from communicating with me, even if I choose not to communicate with them.

I do not hide my feelings, my experiences, or my pain. Not anymore.

I try not to make accusations, but I acknowledge that sometimes I do. Sometimes it's warranted. But I share my experiences openly, for everyone to see, rather than hiding them behind filters for fear of being called to task for them. Silence and censorship are the tools of the abuser. If I've said something about you in private, you can be assured that I'd say it to your face.

I do save everything. Every email, every chat log, every SMS, every DM. When I speak, I make sure that what I say is consistent with the record. That's not for the purpose of "setting traps." It's to keep me from rewriting history in my head. I don't trust my memory. I don't trust yours, either. I can back up what I say. While I don't claim to be the final authority on it, I believe in and strive to know objective reality, even while I also believe in subjective interpretation. I don't think that this is contradictory.
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