May 23rd, 2008

Throbulator

SPREAD THE WORD!!

Tell your friends. Tell your family. Tell every stranger you meet.

Indiana Jones sucked. A lot.

Seriously. It's really bad. It's almost Uwe Boll bad. If George Lucas lived in Tampa I'd be egging his house right now instead of typing this post. Put in Lucasian terms, this makes Episode One look like American Graffiti. The story was contrived even by Indiana Jones standards, and not in the fun, campy style of the rest of the series.

Let me be clear here. I'm not a harsh movie critic (Terminator franchise notwithstanding). I'm not the guy who hates everything and enjoys talking trash about every movie. I'm generally very easy to please when it comes to movies. I'm easily amused, and can usually turn my brain off and just enjoy a good brainless action/adventure flick. This movie made me mad. I feel like I've been duped and insulted.

The best things about seeing this movie were getting to hold femetal's hand, the hot chick in the short miniskirt two rows behind us, and some brief banter amongst the victims audience members. Oh, and my Twizzlers were fresh. The best thing that was actually on the screen was the trailer for Hancock.

BTW, there's nothing extra after the credits, so there's no point sitting through them except for the signature John Williams music. There's not much worth sitting through before the credits either.

EDIT: For the record, I'd gotten an SMS message from zensidhe letting me know that he hated the movie, but I had not read his post when I wrote this one.
  • Current Mood
    disappointed disappointed
Professor Membrane

THE POWER OF THE GODS!!!

RIGHT NOW I'M EATING A POP ROCKS CHOCOLATE BAR WHILE DRINKING A "BATTERY BOTTLE" OF JOLT!!! I WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN!!! I CAN ONLY TYPE IN CAPS!!! ALL SENTENCES END WITH EXCLAMATION POINTS!!! I NOW WIN AT YELLING!!! I JUST ELECTROCUTED MY CO-WORKERS BY THINKING ABOUT LIGHTNING!!!

I'M GOING TO GO THROW A BUILDING NOW!!!
  • Current Music
    THE SOUND OF AWESOME!!!